Fear and Loathing in Subway

It's typical that my sister and I weren't going to indulge ourselves with food that had gone through the “freezer process.” However, there were three Subway gift cards. We were unsure of how much was on any of them, so just to be safe we grabbed the few and took off. In fact, this was the first time I've been in Subway since September. Correction: this was first time I've ordered something there since August. It wasn't nostalgic or anything. Come to think about it, there's only one person that I would know who would get nostalgia from going back to Subway.

Anyways, Rachel and I walked in and... Oh noes! A line. Yea, there was a line of all things, especially on a Packer game day. I thought it was some sort of bleedin' religion in Wisconsin. Not to mention we were both “cellphoneless.” Boy was that odd, not being able to check the time or actually tweet. Let alone receive updates about the game. It had this feeling of being very isolated from the world. So what better to amuse ourselves than by doing “Seinfeld-esque” humor. Or at least I had viewed it like that. Scratch that, that's probably just how I make small talk.

Rachel and I had this witty banter getting back and forth about the gift cards. “What if all the gifts cards are expired?” I jokingly said. Continuing on this tread Rachel said, “What if all the pin numbers were scratched?” Humorous isn't it? The next best thing was to read the backs of the cards. It said to treat it like cash, and that one could register it online. “Oh here's something: it expires after 36 months, or unless stated otherwise.” “What's ‘or stated otherwise?’” I questioned. Actually I found out, though it’s more of an observation, that the line consisted of only one family. Who knew that the Duggars were in town?

The real obstacle is probably knowing what one wants. I assume it’s like a batter: either it's a swing and a hit or a swing and a miss. Gee, look at me using a sport's reference; it's like I'm growing up or something. Mentally preparing myself for the task ahead, I thought to myself: “Meatball footlong on Italian herb and cheese,” “meatball footlong on Italian herb and cheese,” “meatball footlong on Italian herb and cheese,” over and over in my head. Then the big drop came. It hits you like a brick wall. I couldn't come up with anything but “um.” Believe me, I wasn't acting or anything to make the story any cooler. Maybe that's just a part of our society, where we can't go through the assembly line without saying one “um.”

The rest was pretty straight forward. Well, expect for the bearded virgin sandwich artist. It was as if he massaging the meat, which later turned into molesting it. A little OCD much? Just put the damn meat on the sandwich! Who cares if the meat looks or is comfortable? It's meat, it will be fine. Then this isn't complete without the bearded employee struggling to close the sandwich. It was almost as if it was being difficult or a challenge. During his personal wrestle with sandwich, I had given a classic “Wyrembeck glare.”

Does anyone else find Subway's slogan, “Eat Fresh,” the least bit ironic?

Nude Model

 It wasn't a surprise for me or anyone in the art class that there was going to be a nude model on Monday. I assume the purpose of this was for the class to study the human form from life. It was probably much more than studying the female figure. Her physique was young and thin. I shall leave it at that. Moving on, there was one thing that I had very much enjoyed about this whole project. It was that we had returned to using an actual drawing utensil. Oh, how much I do like using charcoal. The last several weeks we had been using an eraser, grease crayons, and ink brushes and all to draw. All of which has been the disappointing part of the class, kinda the low point.

I think I may have explained drawing with an eraser, so yeah. Grease crayons were crayons designed for drawing on cows. And this was for a value only drawing and was very much like painting. It was the same with the next: the ink brush. The ink brush was just as it sounds: a brush used to “draw” with ink. Wait. I take that back; drawing in one-point and two-point perspective were the all-time low. True, it's always good to follow the laws of perspective. It was just too organized for me.


Not only were we going back a legitimate drawing utensil, but we just happened to be allowed to gesture draw; a storm of nothing but lines and perfect mistakes. Note: this is all being played to The Supremes' Where Did Our Love Go, Adam Green's Jacket Full of Danger, and Neil Young's On the Beach. At least it was from my own collection, in order to broaden the class's musical horizons. And Uebelherr had played some of his stuff. Anyways, not to mention my class took very well to Jacket Full of Danger, I was rather impressed that they were actually listening to the lyrics this time.


Anyways, I'm getting sidetracked. I should give the model some chops. I mean, remaining still for thirty to forty minutes per pose. I suppose I need I get to my original point, which is she had quite a knowledge of food science- well, something like that. I was impressed. You see, she had brought a treat for the whole class: homemade marshmallows. Also, they were flavored. There were mocha, root beer, and apple pie. Expect they weren't made with corn syrup. Then she had further explained that most, but not all, farmers use corn to get cows pudgier a lot faster. So all in all I had surprisingly learned something that I won't have thought I would learn in art, or from a model.

Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail '12

 Well, as the influence of Dr. Hunter S. Thompson was brought up a week or two ago… hmm... I wonder which one that could have been? This had gotten me thinking, days later, about an idea for a book. Well a continuation of a book, Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail '12. Note: it’s similar to Thompson's only by the title; with the only exception being the 1, and that it would be more focused on the GOP candidates. I’m not saying the other side of the spectrum won't be interesting, Barack Obama. Like the Harry Nilsson's penned song “One,” which states: “one is the loneliest number.” Now let's bring this back to politics; Obama is just one on the campaign trail, where as Republicans are bringing back the party in the Republican Party. There's like eight or so, and they come with their own personalities.


This forthcoming election will be much more of a circus than that back in 1972. Just look at the characters involved. I mean come on, the characters pretty much write themselves; not much creativity that would go into them. It's almost as if they’re three-dimensional. It’s almost as if they are real. Not to mention, I don't even if a fiction writer could come up with better characters than this.

This lopsided version of the X-Men wouldn’t be anywhere without their Prof. X. Their Charlie to their Angels, their “Dr. No,” would be Ron Paul. Old and frail, Ron hikes up his depends every morning and goes to town. Who'da thunk it that a retro speaker of the house, who happens to be a dinosaur enthusiast, be running? Sure he's got his problems with homosexuals, but really, what Republican candidate doesn't? Not to worry, just like Anita Bryant expects no pie, Newt got all glittered. Yeah, I really think after that he would have a change of heart. I’m not one to point fingers, but it seems to me that Rick Santorum doesn't like most things in this modern age, so I question why he’s even running during these times. Michele Bachmann isn't just there for sex appeal, and her deep metaphors, and inaccurate portrayal of history, and off the wall quotes; she's there for the female vote. Of course, not to be outdone ladies, line up and ride the Herman Cain Train; he'll even pay! I assume for a ticket or something. Well seriously, the sensual Herman Cain just loves the ladies; remember he chose it. Oh noes! I have forgotten Rick Perry. I've got one question for Jon Huntsman: who are you? Sure, out this ragamuffin spirited team, there's only one candidate that I think actually has a chance and it is probably Mitt Romney. Maybe one thing better would be a cat wearing a monocle; that would be fancy.

Then of course in this time and age, I highly doubt that one could actually follow around candidates like the Grateful Dead. Hang on, I'm going to modernize this a bit (well at least up to the nineties, so there isn't any “Wikipedia-ing” going on.) It would be the same as Phish. Wait, do kids still listen to Phish? That's with or without the added ingredients. Anyways, the point I'm getting at is following someone, even for pure journalism purposes, could be construed as stalking. But still this would an experience. Say, I wouldn't have minded doing this for the experience paper.

Please make note that this was written before Herman Cain actually came to the realization that he wasn't going to win with his scandals; only second to Penn State.

A Lot of Tale About (Almost) Something

I might as well get this out of the way: for those you are interested, and for those of who aren't, just sit tight. My turkey day was fine; the Packers won. I listened to Arlo Guthrie's “Alice's Restaurant Massacree.”  And that's all I got to say about that. See, it wasn't that bad. Hang on- I hope everyone's cool with “turkey day,” because there are some pretty up-tight Thanksgiving purists. Wait a minute, isn't that the purpose of a purist? Anyways, this shall not be a vigorous tale of viernes del negro con las muchas personas loca. First, if someone understood my “Spanish,” congratulations. I can't believe I remembered words and etc. Second, I can't see myself actually writing about Black Friday, anyways. It's more about this...

The boy that grew up to be a footrest, Dipping into the 1st international bank of Dusty, The reason people like R2-D2 is because he's white, After being sodomized, Lime, lime, oh and have I forgotten to mention lime, Oh wait there was also some peach, Well at least one point during that escapade,Learning how to hug, “Okay… something just isn’t kosher here.” Punk needs more ukuleles, Ooo that's “caramelly,” How the hell do you get lost in a driveway? Oh, Jim Gaffigan, you and your Hot Pockets jokes.  “They're eating her... and then they're going to eat me... OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!” Okie dokie, woot, woot, lime.

I won't lie. Out content is pretty off-the-wall and might sound like the ramblings of a schizophrenic or just an avant-garde off beat poem. Who's really to say?

Well the best to answer that is probably me. There are only a handful of people who have a remote clue of what this about: those being friends. Being Thanksgiving and all, my friends had come back from their respected schools, Marquette, UWM, St. Norbert, and of course the always forgotten Whitewater.

I could say the weekend started after school, but I have the strangest feeling that's been done before. So I'll say the weekend started at MacDons with Rachel and Peter, and the taste of a McGangBang. Oh, and some very salty French Fries. Moving along, eventually Cody had gotten word that we were hanging at MacDons and making comedic observations. Eventually, I left and went to his house. Cody was explaining how Stueven was planning things for us to do and really wanted us to have fun. To put it Biblically, it was going to be the shit. Then there was also some Pibb involved, however it was rather watery, wink, wink. Also there was lime. Before long, Dusty showed up. Before actually doing what Stueven had planned, we were all invited to a mini-reunion with other Howards Grove graduates. After that, we managed to get back to Stueven's and the hours of debauchery had begun. Before long it was time to leave. Well, walking back to my vehicle, I questioned Stueven's coolness level, but more importantly, when did this all go down? I mean, shit, since when did Stueven get so cool?

The next day, Thanksgiving, wasn't that much different, except that we had watched a terrible cult film, Troll 2. With lime. On Black Friday, I wasn't the crazy one to get up early, let alone even going to a retail store. My Black Friday was spent at Music Boxx where I found Arlo Guthrie's Alice's Restaurant; weird, it's like completing the circle or something. I also found Santana and Elephant's Memory. Cody had gotten the Black Key's new single, “Lonely Boy” on a 12” single, which also had a reverse groove; that's pretty neat! Dusty purchased a new vinyl of Dream Theater's Metropolis Pt. 2: Scenes from a Memory. That was about it for actual shopping on Black Friday for me and/or us. Well, maybe not Dusty, since he had gotten a winter coat. The day eventually ended with us going to Stueven's house, though there wasn't Stueven to be found. However it wasn't a total loss. We got to see the movie Kick-Ass and had an adventure to get a Wal-mart pizza. That adventure included fruitlessly mining for CDs in a seemingly bottomless bin. By the time we had gotten back, it seemed as if we hadn't ever left; Carter and Phil were still in the same places and playing Madden 10. We did watch The Big Lebowski, but sadly we didn't finish it.

Everyone went out to breakfast on Saturday. I didn't. Well that's a dead topic. That's weird. Why even bring it up? I don't know, remorse? Or maybe it was just to help lengthen this. I guess I like to breathe life into one's interest, and quickly. Hey you know what's interesting? Canoeing and kayaking. Well, maybe their “Whitewatered” definitions. Hours had passed and we listened to records at my home until we got the go-ahead from Stueven. There, we finished The Big Lebowski and watched other movies. When Urkel & The Doctor from Star Trek: Voyager are the only real actors in the whole film, you just know it's got to be good. Okay, I lied, there's also a gay pornstar. And I can’t forget to mention the most realistic-looking mega shark and crocosaurus that I have ever seen. Mixing that together with several snide comments and smart-ass questions, one would get Mega Shark Versus Crocosaurus. I won't say what happens, the title says it all. (Oh by the way, Dusty, you were right about Urkel being in the movie.) Anywho, though everyone really would've liked to continue with another terrible movie, it just didn't happen. With lime. Our next move was watching a Jim Gaffigan stand-up comedy act, Beyond the Pale. I thought it was a decent way to end this weekend. Always remember to end on a high note!

In the long run, I can honestly say that I was spoiled to the nth degree this weekend. Like most things, everything must come to an end, and everything returns back to the normal flow. Just 25 days now.

Flutes, and Twilight, and Drugs! Oh, My!

This week, Art wasn't too special or anything except drawing with an eraser. Grrr, I didn't care too much for that. Anyways, Wednesday's class, continuing that nightmare, Uebelherr had put on Elgar's Pomp and Circumcision. Oops, Circumstance, well whatever.  It then sparked the question of why?  Later I learned that it was the soundtrack to A Clockwork Orange (by the way, if you haven't seen or read it, then you're missing out big time), which, in some way, made it better. Since Uebelherr lets me bring in my own vinyls, I decided to play something that would pick me up. I chose Captain Beefheart's Safe as Milk. Well that got Uebelherr all excited, so I concluded that it was a muy bueno choice. The vinyl ended with a mind-blowing theremin "solo" and I had to flip the record. This was probably the first time that my class had ever heard a theremin. As I was flipping the vinyl, I had received a text. Shocking, I know. Well, not really considering I would get a text at least once in a while from a person in a Milwaukee. So I just ignored it.

Eventually I opened it after class, like a boss. It wasn't who I assumed it was. It was from Cathi. I thought that was odd, because she should have been in school. The message was “how long does this go on for?” I was more or less just puzzled by this. I mentally face-palmed myself when I actually realized what she was talking about. It's about wisdom teeth. My assumption for her actually asking me was rather simple. I had my wisdom teeth taken out during the middle of the summer. Yep, those three fun-filled days or so: spitting up blood, watching movies (one of which starred James Franco and James Franco's arm), eating nothing but soft to liquid foods, and of course my personal favorite: me pretending to be Dr. House. Gotta love Vicodin. I responded with: “A week or two.”

I could just imagine what she was going through. Plus, knowing her love of gore and blood, she would be in heaven. And yet, I think what I had yearned for the most was eating solid foods, especially meat. Actually, I had the craving for meatloaf, of all things. Her yearning was nothing more than playing her flute. Ugh. Since I've never been under the hypnotic seduction of the flute before, and never plan on it, I guess I shouldn't be talking. But really, a flute over solid foods? I just don't get it. It must be a fleek thing.

It got better after I got home and received another text, asking if I was still going. Now, I like Milwaukee. I don't have a problem with it. I mean, it has UW-M, Summerfest, the Oriental, etc. However, I wasn't going to Milwaukee this weekend, and wasn't even planning on it. I assumed it was because of her drug-induced state that she came up with the false idea that I was going to Milwaukee for the weekend. Maybe I should have gone this weekend, but oh well. Going would have meant attending the midnight screening of the new Twilight movie. Please note it's not even a proper midnight screening; if one were actually to do so I would regimen Night of the Living Dead, Reefer Madness, Freaks, Pink Flamingos, or The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Well, my knowledge on Twilight is, well, very little to none. I mean, I do have an idea that it’s about fake vampires^[1] and plastic werewolves^[2].  Of course, I know that there's Eddie baby and most of the book was half-written by Billy Shakes. There’s also Kirsten Stewart, who acts like a Vulcan. Wait, that would be offending Mr. Spock (And also, Mr. Spock shows more emotion than Stewart could ever hope for). Better yet, Stewart's acting is like a vegetable. Oh no, that's no good either. I'm now dissing pizza, this country. I guess there just isn't a nice way of putting it; she has the same dumb, emotionless facial expression throughout the whole film. I probably can make the assumption that the whole series is like this as well.

Wait, maybe instead of portraying it in the not-so-nicest of light, I could list the positives: it's not a 3-D film and, wait, no, that's pretty bad. Okay, okay I got it; this is from a George Takei tweet: “Dear Twilight Fans: Thank you for making our fans [Star Trek] look normal.” This is a true fact. Oh, I know I could make suggestions for improvements. Hear this, Stephanie Meyer, this is all for you. First things first: get rid of that vampire sparkle bullshit. I understand that PCP is a powerful drug and all, but Stephanie, darling, you’ve got to lay off the angel dust; it's messing with your mind, dear. I mean, Bram Stoker has raised and set the bar for all vampires, and being sparkly isn't one of them. Look at Bela Lugosi or Count Orlok; nothing sparkles about him (well maybe their personalities.) God, I feel like I'm talking about Halloween all over again. However, I will throw you: Vlad may have been a bit sparkly.

Next, instead of having Jacob turn into a werewolf (yeah, I'll admit that I did some research), he should turn into a miniature Shetland pony instead. That would most certainly be an improvement. I mean, he doesn’t follow any werewolf ideology, so it would be only natural to have him changed into a miniature Shetland pony. Now that would be pretty bitchin’. Well, maybe the only thing better would be a eight-inch stallion.

The next order of action, of course, would be getting a different actress instead of Stewart. She was probably all that they could afford. Maybe they could get Zsa Zsa Gabor or Whoopi Goldberg. Hmm...  better yet, they could save a couple of bucks and scrap her character completely. Then I assume the storyline would be a bit different, however, not to worry, I've a solution for that as well. Simply have a Brokeback twist between Eddie baby and Jacob. Hang on, I have the strangest feeling that I've gone off on a tangent and dabbled into some fan fiction. Hmm… where was I going with this? Oh yeah, so anyways, with the help of “Rotten Tomatoes” I learned that Breaking Dawn (Part 1), (Part 1?!?!, so I can make the assumption there's going to be more. Unless they're just trolling fans; if so, that would be pretty funny, and if not I they're milking the franchise for everything that it's worth), was rated with a 26%. My guess is that Cathi’s pain in her mouth will be ignored as her eyes and ears are bleeding. Also, I guess it isn't the worst idea to go there hopped up on Vicodin.

All I hope is she didn't drive herself...
(See, I do care.)

On a completely separate note, I've got an idea for a mix/mash-up: step one: take a full serving of Florence Foster Jenkins' "unique" voice, singing her infamous aria, “Queen of the Night Aria.” It’s the same one from Mozart's, The Magic Flute. Then, smother with one of Lou Reed's Metal Machine Music. I prefer part two, but any one of them will do. People might eventually make the connection that this would be just a flat-out terrible as a song. However, I think it would be the perfect example of outsider music.

_________________________________________________________________________

[1] They don't fear the sunlight; in fact, they sparkle in it. WTF?! My best guess is that they enjoy garlic bread and looking at themselves in the mirror, that they don't change into bats, and that a wooden stake is probably their best friend!

[2] He doesn't need the moon, isn't played by Lon Chaney, Jr., and doesn't wear a shirt... and especially isn't played by Lon Chaney, Jr.  However, I still think a silver bullet would get the job done.

Michele Bachmann (Note: Not Kristen Wiig)

Before actually getting into the blog itself, I think it would be for the best if I were to set up this blog, although this isn't really the usual "norm" for me...

 ...I suppose that it was week or so ago where, during class, Azor had brought up Bachman-Turner Overdrive (I don't remember the reason why). He asked me if I listened to BTO. Well, I said, “yeah, but I prefer the Guess Who more.” Which lead Azor to say, “I'm not going to ask your opinion of Michele Bachmann. However, it might be an idea for a blog post.”

  ...and that's that for the most part (also, I should probably throw in a disclaimer that, though this may seem "one sided," I would like to note that any and all political parties are dangerous to one's moral being). So without any further delay, here is the feature presentation, not shown in 3-D... 

I’m pretty sure that most of the world, and by “most of the world” I mean those Americans that actually care, could view Michele Bachmann as a Sarah Palin protégée (well a more successful protégée, unlike Christine O'Donnell. Remember her? Oh I hope they didn't burn her at the stake, tehe). Anyways, for the reasonable person, that probably does hold some merit (and if not, then please look up the definition of protégée). However, this isn't what my blog is about.

Early in the week, I was just sitting, watching the rain and playing 3-D pinball (note: this was after watching the live stream of Abbey Road). Someone told me that “everything relates to the good” (it was something that he had learned in his philosophy class, which I tried to make sense of). I kept thinking about the idea of everything relating to the good, on a count that Michele Bachmann and I don't see eye-to-eye on everything/anything/some things. The first thing that comes to mind when Michele Bachmann is being related to the good is that she's portrayed by Kristen Wiig on Saturday Night Live. Nothing says good or winning like Wiig; she's like a female Bill Hader or Fred Armisen.

Michelle Bachmann isn't Ann Coulter. Bachmann is the kind of girl, who likes the first amendment and water-boarding. Okay, Michele did have that personal quirk of looking in the wrong direction that one time. Still, I'll take looking in the wrong direction over forgetting one of the most used words of your campaign. You know, like that one candidate, I forget his name... (In all seriousness, I think people should be a bit more concerned about his wanting to cut education than the lovable Texan governor's memory problem). Months back, Newsweek had given the honor of placing Bachmann on the cover, which had this, I don't know, Charles Manson-esque feel about the photo (it's the eyes). For what it's worth, Manson did have charismatic eyes, which led things to get accomplished, so in a roundabout way this is a compliment. Good news, Bachmann isn't remotely spelled or defined the same as Rick Santorum's last name (and one tends to thank Dan Savage, thanks Mr. Savage). I'll admit that Bachmann is nowhere as retro as Newt Gingrich, but on the other hand, Bachmann doesn't buy her husband expensive jewelry from Tiffany's (even though he might like it once and awhile). Another positive would be, or at least I would view it has a positive, that five women haven't come forward claiming that Bachmann had sexually harassed them. Wait, or would that be hot?!? Hmm... Well while that's busy tickling the heterosexual male's mind, let's move on to the next topic.

The thing about Bachman that does get me all warm and fuzzy inside is, gaffes (well, I think that’s what it’s called, just don't quote me not it, tehe). I think that for the most part, her “oops” has been a part of her characteristics, whether she like likes them or not. So why not explore some.

She has this odd idea that carbon dioxide isn't a harmful gas. Interesting theory, dog, I just don't want to be the guinea pig to test that out. I suppose learning that Disney's The Lion King is nothing more than “gay propaganda” was certainly was an eye opener. Gee, and I thought it was Disney's take on Billy Shakes' Hamlet, but boy was I wrong. Moving on the same train of thought, Elton John isn't better at what he does because he can play the piano or write a tune. It's because he's a homosexual. So remember kids, if you want to successful in life just be gay. Hey, don't knock it until you try it. Just more words of wisdom from Michele Bachmann. Boy for a politician, who isn't too keen on gays or gay marriage, she certainly does like to have them on the brain. When talking about the swine flu (Remember that? Retro isn't it?), she did find an “interesting coincidence” between the outbreak in ‘76 and ‘90. Except she had the knack of pronouncing Gerald Ford like jim-ee kahr-ter, and then for some reason thinking he was a Democrat. Weird? I guess that blew her coincidence out of the water. A bit more history: John Quincy Adams wasn't a founding father. The founding fathers didn't work endlessly to stop slavery, sorry about that, dude. However, I will admit that I don't know of any candidate that knows that birthplace of an infamous clown serial killer. Who knows, it could be the winning answer to a trivia contest. That's assuming when the question is being read, it's actually being misread by ignoring the 'Gacy' part. Of course, not all of them are silly. She had the nicest of all gestures to wish Elvis a happy birthday on August 16th.

At least she didn't pull a 'Lambert Field;' remember that, Kerry? Sure Bachmann has chalked up quite a list of “oops,” but don't we all at some times? I think best case scenario for Bachmann would be getting the Republican party's presidential nomination (big if) and then getting a running mate whose last name is Turner. Then use BTO's “Takin' Care of Business” as their campaign song. That would be epic, though only to a point, of course.

Just remember that Kristen Wiig is the comedian, not Bachmann.

Not to be outdone by any other of my little tidbits at the end, here's this week's "Columbo" moment: During the end of this week, I learned that Aleister Crowley and Aldous Huxley had dined together in Berlin back in October of 1930. Well, sure this isn't news-breaking or earth-shattering, and to be honest, probably a bit outdated. However, just the idea of these characters actually meeting is still pretty mind-blowing. Well, I thought it was pretty neat, but that's just me.

Album Reviews - October

Same deal as last month. Just this time a bit less extensive.


Tarkio Road (1970), Brewer & Shipley - Not many people can say they landed on Nixon's "enemies list," and were called a "modern spiritual" all for the same reason. Being that I'm a softy for the then next great American spiritual. Isn't that right Lawrence? Spiritual about what, I wonder. Typical folk-rock album, vocal harmonies, acoustic guitars, and then there's this... trying to throw President Tricky Dick out of office, mixed with the romanticism of Mary Jane. Also they throw in a couple of wah-wahs here and there. Going a step further, "Tarkio Road" could quite possibly be a soundtrack to any "Cheech and Chong" film. Tracks worth the mention are: "One Toke Over The Line," "Don't Want to Die in Georgia," "Tarkio Road," "Seems Like A Long Time," and "Fifty States Of Freedom." I should also mention the track, "Oh Mommy," which includes the wicked steel guitar playing of the Grateful Dead's very own Jerry Garcia. And if you get nothing more from this than "One Toke Over the Line" stuck in your head, then I have done my job. Once again Mr. Welk, what did you think toke meant? B+


Ceremonials (2011), Florence + the Machine - In all honesty, I was skeptical about their sophomore release, just after listening to the first few minutes. I had noticed a different sound. Indeed, a difference in their style. Looks like Florence has been dabbling in some chamber music here. Also sounds like there is some Adele influence here, but that's just me. Of course like Adele, Florence can actually belt out a tune or more. Tracks worth the mention: "What the Water Gave Me," "Never Let Me Go," "Breaking Down," "Lover To Lover," and "Spectrum." Even though I still yearned for the sounds Lungs again. A-


The Black Album (2003), Jay-Z - Move over Metallica, I found another Black Album. Next I'll come out and say it. I'm not a connoisseur of the hip-hop genre. There I said it (I feel much better getting that off my chest). Surprisingly this was palatable and sure the lyrics aren't up to par with Ginsburg or any another Beatnik poem, but still there is something going on here... I just don't know what it is. Songs worth the mention: "What More Can I Say," "99 Problems," "Public Service Announcement," "Lucifer," "Allure," and "My 1st Song." Suppose the next step is Danger Mouse's The Grey Album. A-


Oracular Spectacular (2007), MGMT - A modern day, "electronic" verison of early Tyrannosaurus Rex. I'm not that far off by comparing them to T. Rex. The singer also has a Marc Bolan-esque to his voice. I love it. This duo certainly does paint a picture of modern day psychedelia (as well as their music videos, but that's a different subject). A genre that I never thought would have a revival, but here it is. Songs worth the mention "Time To Pretend," "Weekend Wars," "Electric Feel," "Pieces of What," "Of Moons, Birds & Monsters," and "The Handshake." A-


Teenage Dream (2010), Katy Perry - This is a pop album. I don't know if that's a call for alarm, but who knows? Sure the album contains several singles about sex. Alright sex; with that being said and still having high hopes for this. I assumed that the whole album had the same feel. However that wasn't the case and they just weren't exactly met. Beyond the main singles, the other songs were either ranging from average to sad. And then there was the song "Peacock," nice attempt at humor, Katy Perry. Song worth mentioning: "Teenage Dream," "Last Friday Night (T.G.I.F.)," and "Firework." Question, does Russell Brand has an influence on her music? I'm not really sure if he does. C


Lulu (2011), Lou Reed & Metallica - Not knowing what to think about this from the 90 second preview of "The View." For the most part, I really was just hoping it going be like Berlin meets Metal Machine Music (or instead, insert popular Metallica album there. Wait; scratch that. Actually I like Metal Machine Music there). I suppose in retrospect the album does follow through with being like Metal Machine Music (whether that it's not the way I was hoping). And by far the most unique album Metallica has ever worked on. The music is definitively Metallica's and the lyrics are definitively Lou Reed's. The fact of the matter is the lyrics are too much for Metallica fans and the music is probably too much for Lou Reed fans. Songs that I found to be decent  were "Ice Honey" and "Junior Dad." And maybe generations from now, someone will find it on a shelf, collecting dust, and find it to be legit. Who knows? B-

Yeah, It's That Time of the Year Again...

Since it's that time of the year again. Of course getting dressed up for Halloween and going trick-or-treating is certainly one way to get into the festivities (or one could also just go see Rocky Horror at midnight. Maybe like at the Oriental in Milwaukee, just a thought). Then of course for the less motivate few, there is the AMC and their “AMC Fear Fest.” Sure AMC Fear Fest doesn't have the greatest marathons just replaying the Halloween series over and over again (except for something reason unbeknownst to be, is that they seem to skip the second film). Of course it would be nice, once in awhile, to see a Béla Lugosi, Lon Chaney, Jr. or Boris Karloff films. Now Béla Lugosi and Lon Chaney, Jr. films are the correct portrayal of vampires and werewolves contrary to what Stephenie Meyers would like you to believe, tehe. Curious though, I wonder if Béla Lugosi really though of Boris Karloff like what was portrayed in Ed Wood. Or, any movie that Vincent Price stars in. Anyways when set in their normal setting each antagonists fares pretty well, but what if they were place and pitted against another in a “bread and circuses”?

She a bookworm for any Paul Sheldon novel (well maybe just the ones that involve the character Misery) and the other one is “a smart big fish.” Given, that these two surprisingly had a confrontation with one another, but if Annie Wilkes and Jaws had met. Who would come out on top? Well from the best of my knowledge Jaws spends most of its' time in the water; if not all. And sure, Jaws can go under with three barrels (ooo; very impressive), and muches beach goers and swimmers. Annie Wilkes has the training of a nurse and certainly does have her way of pwning Paul Sheldon. Whether that be in the book (cutting his foot off and slicing his thumb) or the movie (making his ankle bend in ways that ankles just shouldn't bend). Oh; and Wilkes can take a typewriter to the head. Not entirely positive, but I'm almost pretty sure sharks don't have ankles, feet, or thumbs, so no help there for Wilkes. Good news, sharks don't own or use typewriters. Hmm... It's a gamble but I'm still going with the Kathy Bates portrayed character to take down the “oversized sardine.”

Next up the loveable rabies-infected family dog and the mask wearing, and the Canadian comedian name sharing (sounds the same, but spelled different), kitchen knife enthusiast. Yep, that's right; Michael Myers and Cujo are in a hostile augment that can be only solved with some old-fashion “fisticuffs.” Now to put it bluntly, Michael Myers is a trekkie. So as a devoted trekkie wearing his favorite Captain Kirk mask while doing what he does best on Halloween. And has the ability to created a horcrux (of course this is a stretch). I only came to this conclusion, with the fourth installment of Halloween as my evidence, where he had placed a piece of his soul into his niece, Jamie Lloyd. On the other hand Cujo is a lot less complex than Myers. Cujo's story is pretty straight forward; a dog with rabies. Unlike Myers, Cujo's motive is very much less family related and attack just about whoever. And I'd like to add, that Cujo is a trooper, being that he can be bashed in the head many times over and over again, and still walk away “unscathed” on all fours. One could say that's same for Myers, but I've learned that if one could pin him; say between a fallen tree and a burning van, that could possibly end him. Myers was pinned pretty good and ain't go nowhere. And considering that Cujo isn't a family member of Myers. I think it's pretty safe to say I'd put my money on the sick puppy.

And finally a sweet little angel, who happens to be demonic possessed with a mouth like a sailor named Regan MacNeil and Leatherface were locked in a room together, which would come out first? Given that Regan has the ability to have her head do a 360 and can make projectile -barf green. Sure it's not the same as being pistol-whipped with a hotdog, still it's pretty bad. Leatherface does like his chainsaw and wearing a mask (assuming that he made himself). Sadly, he can only make pig sounds, while Regan has a deep male voice (and at other times, can speak backwards and sometimes in perfect Italian). I will say this about Leatherface; he does have two thing over other antagonist, respecting his elders and being able to perform an interpretative dance (well at least I consider it to be an interpretative dance). Indeed; Leatherface does perform an interpretative dance with his chainsaw at the end of the film. Leather appears to be mortal; well Regan has Lucifer on her side. Got to go with the projectile-barfer with the sailor mouth (only assuming she isn't tied to the bed and still possessed).

I almost forgot, however this is going to be off topic. It's not a big deal; just think of it as Halloween III, tehe. Anyways re-discovered MGMT and how legit they are this weekend. The day following Halloween this year the Beach Boys' SMiLE is finally going to be officially released. So both are pretty good deals there.

Oh MediaMonkey (or Dusty), Why?

This weekend was chocked full of friends returning home from their respected schools. Best part is, is that all had gotten to stay for the weekend, so good deal there. Well, except for Dusty, who could only stay til 4 on Saturday, and needed to get back to where ever Whitewater is. Anyway, on Saturday after brunch, Cody needed a documentary for his film class. So, Cody, Cathi, Dusty, and I went to the library (the others didn't really want to or were busy). Of course, I had an ulterior motive for being there. Of course, it was expanding my musical horizons or getting music in FLAC. Cody searched for one of the documentaries off of his list. He had found Food, Inc. and ripped onto his laptop. While he was doing that; I had gone off in search of CDs. Coming back with a nice stack of them. Now, Dusty was all worried that I wasn't going to finish in time. Since he had to leave by 4 in the afternoon and time was of the essence. I had used the MediaMonkey instead of MusicBee (MediaMonkey rips CDs faster than MusicBee).


So Dusty, being the nice person that he is (or really just wanted to leave the library and get back to Whitewater. Who knows?), had volunteered to rip them all. Showing him (I assumed he was listening) that one simply hits the "Rip selected Audio CD to hard ware" button and then hit the "OK" button. Simple enough or so I thought. So, I could get my exercise in-addition too returning the CDs to their appropriate homes. Now everyone knows that Dusty isn't the greatest with technology. I had know this, and yet I thought nothing of it, because of the simplicity of the matter.


Now it's not entirely Dusty's fault; he did rip the CDs. However only to a certain point. That 'certain point' being only the first track of every album. Hmm I have yet to figure out how he did that... (though I have multiple theories). I suppose MediaMonkey could have shared some fault as the user. MediaMonkey compare to the more popular iTunes; is that it isn't as straight forward as it could be. As iTunes goes, one would just pop in the disc and imports them as so. And MediaMonkey, one must go through steps to achieve the same goal. So, I suppose the technology, the music programs, could be at some fault here. Or I could go as far to make the argument that iTunes has spoiled the user by making everything seem easier than it really is. Is that necessarily a bad thing? Well probably not; however making it simple isn't always the best.


Finding (and then losing) 20 or so treasures such as: The White Stripes, Brian Wilson, Wilco, Tom Waits, The Beau Brummels, Bob Dylan, The Band, Ry Cooder, The Black Crowes, The Raconteurs, Jakob Dylan, Arcade Fire and The Decemberists, oh well. I guess it wasn't entirely a lose (though it was); got two of Dylan's electric albums (that were complete): Highway 61 Revisited and Bringing It All Back Home in FLAC. Oh well, looks like I get to go back to the library.



Eventually we had watched Food, Inc. and we actually did learn from it. Believe it or not, but I had noticed that the director did used some rhetorical choices to get the point across about the food industry. And eventually Cathi had arrived and it was time to watch the 1970 version of The Wizard of Gore (since Halloween is coming up and Cathi just loves blood and gore, tehe). At the end Cody, Phil, and I had a good laugh. I don' think Cathi enjoyed as much, oh well. Isn't that just a shame?

Rocky Horror!!! :D

Originally, I had the idea for this blog to be like this...
     I had faced a conundrum this weekend. You see, I had recently went down to UWM for Saturday night and Sunday morning, where I visited a friend; Cody. So far, this isn't the conundrum. This is just leading up to the conundrum. Anyways, visiting Cody wasn't the entire reason I was in Milwaukee. Well maybe it was? Nevertheless the main reason for my trek to Milwaukee was The Rocky Horror Picture Show (as seen to the right). Now being Richard and all. One must first know that Richard likes The Rocky Horror Picture Show, yet Richard doesn't like glitter (And yes, I know I'm writing in third person. I thought it is an added effect, but who knows?). Therefore with that being said; Richard shouldn't like Rocky Horror, due to the fact that there is glitter. And yet he does like it despite the fact that of glitter.
     ... Then I thought that wouldn't be too fun to talk about (Plus I didn't have to worry about any glitter, so good deal there). Far too much logic for a Sunday night. So I rather talked about the experience, itself.


Sure, I dressed up for the occasion; having my nails painted (which were approved by a frequent Rocky Horror goer). Dressed in fishnets (which I was complimented on, quote: they we're "Fancy" or maybe it was "Classy." Either or they were both still compliments), a black skirt, two unmatched socks, a Hello Kitty shirt, and a red feather boa. Sadly, I wasn't up for the challenge of walking in heels. So I just wore pink-plaid, shoelace-less, knock-off Converse. So you know, I was looking good. Now, being that I was a virgin. I didn't really know what was to be expected, as a virgin. Standing in line I was marked with a 'V,' in red lipstick, on my forehead. As well other virgins standing in line. Don't think that's all a virgin has to do on their first time. However this is as far as I will tell; I don't want to spoil it for any other would-be virgins. 


Beyond the virgin part, I basically had an idea of what was going to go down. Such as knowing what J-A-N-E-T spells, the items that were to be thrown at the screen (except they didn't use hot dogs, but oh well), and that other movie-goers shouting their own "commentary" during the movie. One gets to join in doing the "Time Warp," just remember it's a jump to the left and a step to the right. Certainly experiencing it live is really just an experience. You see that their is a live cast acting out the whole film as it was playing on. So it was pretty sweet.


If any thing that I have learned, it probably would be that fishnets aren't to comfortable. Well I mean they aren't too comfortable while crawling on all fours. Yeah; after that my knees hurt. Another thing would be, that rice does get everywhere. It really does get stuck in hair; I'm still picking them out and still finding more elsewhere. This was certainly an enjoyable experience involving transvestism and I think I will be going down there again for the Halloween weekend showing. And maybe, just maybe, I'll be bringing more along with me from Sheboygan. Oh, I almost forgot. I lost my shoes in Milwaukee... (Don't worry, I have an idea where they might be).

Hmm...

I honestly got nothing for this blog post... So yeah, I'm just going to be a bit random (or not), enjoy. The weekend was pretty sweet for the most part, well the weather was certainly amazing for being that it's during the month of October and all. With that being said, it was also the perfect opportunity to get some sketches, gesture drawings, done for Uebelherr's class. Nothing too complex just simple things, trees and/or flowers, but made of hundreds of lines that are varying length and value.  


Friday afternoon, imported CDs that I had borrowed from the school's library earlier that day. The music was ranging from early as Blind Willie McTell, Memphis Minnie, and Woody Guthrie to bit-closer-to-modern-times as Ramones, Sex Pistols, and the soundtrack from Woodstock. So you know, nothing but the good stuff. Had fun on the Spotify and through that I had found out that Jay-Z's The Black Album is certainly and surprisingly palatable, didn't know that. Downloaded A Tree with Roots, bootleg of a more complete version of The Basement Tapes. So good deal there. Also listening to the Smashing Pumpkins' "Bullet with Butterfly Wings" just has a strange feeling that it, would be a perfect song for Captain Beefheart to sing, but that's just me.


Was used as a pawn in my sister's game, of getting Paranormal Activity 2, it was surprisingly what I had assumed it to be.., from Family Video. Apparently, you have to be 18 or older in order to rent it, who knew? The journey to Family Video wasn't all a lost. I had surprisingly found Nowhere Boy, a bio-pic about John Lennon's early life. Incidentally this coincides with what would have been Lennon's 71st birthday. The movie was good, I enjoyed it. Learned that John Lennon called his Aunt every weekend for the rest of his life. 


New Saturday Night Live, Ben Stiller hosted and Foster the People were musical guests. Foster the People had played their radio hit "Pumped Up Kicks," which by the way isn't  about killing people. And a lesser known song... um I think it was "Houdini," but I can't really be too sure.  As I was being distracted by the appearance of Kenny G. Yeah, Kenny G was there... I just had to question Foster the People now, after a stun like that. Highlights about SNL were the recurring Weekend Update's New York Correspondent, Stefon. Stefon would report on where ourist, who are looking for a nice vacation could go. Which for him, were nothing New York's hottest clubs. And another would've been the Underground Festival, where their festival was just as nightmarish as Stefon's clubs. But of course they both were a knee slapper.


And I had also learned that nobody can sing the blues like Blind Willie McTell. Thanks for pointing that out Zimmerman. It just might be true.

Album Reviews - September

During this past month, I had the opportunity to listen almost 30 albums (Thanks to Spotify, my own vinyl collection, and other unnamed sources). And yet for some reason I feel that this is lacking in someway, oh well. The album reviews are as follow (note, not all of them listed): 

Winners
Cripple Crow (2005) - Devendra Banhart - This double album has the sound of early Tyrannosaurus Rex mixed with the Incredible String Band. In doing so it gives it that 60s psych-folk sound, which is a refreshment of other mainstream genres of the time. One thing, that I didn't see coming was that he sang a couple of songs in Spanish (that was different). On another note Devendra Banhart does have the sound of Marc Bolan in his voice, that's just crazy. Favorite tracks "Lazy Butterfly," "The Beatles," and "Chinese Children."
Mellow Gold (1994) – Beck - I can't believe I haven't listen to this before. Beck crossing and re-inventing genres, simply amazing. This certainly was a treat. Having witty surrealistic lyrics doesn't hurt either. Favorite Tracks "Loser," "Soul Suckin' Jerk," "Sweet Sunshine," "Beercan," and "Nitemare Hippy Girl."
Out to Hunch (1986) - Hasil Adkins – If country was more like this. I would feel a lot safer at night. Favorite tracks "No More Hot Hogs," "Chicken Walk," "Can't Help It Blues," "Hot Dog Baby," "Teenie Weenie Waddy Kiss," and "Truly Ruly."


Losers
Born to Run (1975) - Bruce Springsteen - This was nothing more than a piss stain. And that's me being nice. Here's a tip for the saxophonist, who really needs to learn more than just six notes (only repeating them over and over, and being quite loud about it, just isn't to cool). I mean really listen to some Coltrane or Parker, and learn something. Only good thing about this was Jim Steinman made a much better album for Meat Loaf to sing. Favorite track “Tenth Avenue Freeze-Out” (only bearable track).
My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy (2010) - Kanye West - Liking the use of King Crimson's "21st Century Schizoid Man." This album actually tricked me, having me to believe it was legit . For the first six tracks, it would have been great. But after those tracks, the album loses its' mojo. Making it confusing and tasteless. Favorite tracks "Dark Fantasy," "Power," and "All of the Lights."
Blowin' Your Mind! (1967) - Van Morrison - Sure the album has "Brown Eyed Girl," but beyond that it's really not that great. I never actually thought I would have ever said that about a Van Morrison album, but I guess it happens. Well, I will put it like this, for a Van Morrison album there is very little to no creative input, unlike his is future albums. Favorite tracks "Brown Eyed Girl," "He Ain't Give You None," and "T.B. Sheets." (On a side note, everything after this album up to Veedon Fleece is genius).
It's Not Killing Me (1969) - Michael Bloomfield – Sure being Mike Bloomfield, you do have something going for you, being a kick ass guitarist. But singing isn't one of them. Much of the problem is Bloomfield's singing, it's all over the place. Due to this, this his guitar playing suffers. In a strange way this could be seen as a domino effect for the blues guitarist, never really achieving the same fame as he previously had. Favorite tracks 'It's Not Killing Me,” and “Next Time You See Me.” 


Others

Common Faults (2008) - The Silent Comedy - This albums has potential of actually being something as well as the band. Being that The Silent Comedy is a relativity "new" band. They have the sound of Mumford and Sons mixed with a dash of Wolfmother. The band switches genres between hard rocking electric blues to folk rock throughout most of the album, and sometimes combines the two. Not saying that's a bad thing, but the listener can at times feel lost. Favorite tracks “'49,” “Poison,” “The Well,” “Bartholomew,” “Tightrope,” “Moonshine,” and “Gasoline.”

Opus Lengthemus (1989) – Poopshovel - This little treasure hails from Madison, Wisconsin. That within itself is pretty neat. Being that this is their debut album and not knowing who they are or what they sounded like was something. For some reason I had this false idea that they would have the sound of the Dead Kennedys, however that wasn't the case. They were punk (in someway) and metal. Oh, they also include jazz (they have a trumpet player in the band, that was something). Favorite tracks “African Bees,” “Sausage,” and “Ouija Board.”
So Jealous (2004) - Tegan and Sara - The album started out slow, but when it hit the third or fourth track the album really took off. This Canadian folk duo real caught my attention, because at quick glance album cover looks like Steely Dan's Aja. So I just had to listen to it. They certainly are bringing back the New Wave genre, that's apparent throughout the album. Favorite tracks “I Know I Know I Know,” “Where Does the Good Go,” “Downtown,” and “I Won't Be Left,” and “Walking with a Ghost”

High Society (2007) - The Silver Seas - The Silver Seas are the American answer the Mumford and Sons, mixed with some blue-eyed white soul. Enough said. Favorite tracks “The Country Life,” “Ms. November,” and “Catch Your Own Train.”

Riot on an Empty Street (2004) - Kings of Convenience - This could be the Norwegian Indie-Folk duo's best album, well at least so far. Having a Simon & Garfunkel-esque to their music, so nothing can go wrong with that. The album overall has a nice vibe to it. Favorite tracks "Homesick," "Misread," "Know How," "Sorry or Please," "I'd Rather Dance With You," and "Gold in the Air of Summer."

The Cat and the Cobra (1999) - Les Savy Fav - This album wasn't really burned into my memory. So I'm guessing that it was pretty average then, if I don't remember it. Oops. I think the album was either suppose to be alternative or indie, or a possible combination of them both. Or it was just noise.

Bye Bye Michael Scott

     The season premiere of the Office was this past Thursday, well, there are certainly changes and surprises. Such as the main one, no more Michael Scott as the boss of Duder Mifflin. I wonder if the Office can really survive without him. I mean sure, Steve Carell was basically half the show, but is it stable enough to stand without their fearless leader. Then again, they still do have Toby. From what I had knew prior to watching this episode was hearing something about James Spader joining the Office. Foolishly I had assumed that he was replacing Steve Carell's character. Well that wasn't the case, it just so happened that James Spader's character had replaced Kathy Bates' character as the CEO (what a twist).

     So, then the question is asked, who's the new boss? Well it turns out to be Andy. Andy has one main goal, which is getting a half-day on Columbus Day. Surprisingly Dwight is actually pretty cool about it. Even Dwight has a new morning routine, which he has grown accustom to. Pam is pregnant again, as well as Angela. Also “planking” has become quite popular around the office. The whole episode was based around theses lists that James Spader's character had left around the office. The list had different names of the members of the office. Assorted on either the left or the right side. It just so happens that Spader's character is doing the same idea as people who doodle, just Spader's character makes lists of different scenarios.

     Like, in many situation comedies, this has been situation where comedic stuff is about to happen. So members of the entire office try and figure out what the list means. Spader's character later takes employees that are on the left column out to lunch, well the others, ones that are on the right column, stay back and have a pizza party. It is later revealed that those employees are the winners of the office and the others are the losers. Of course this plays well, Kevin takes it to heart and send a office wide text to the left behinds, more or less insulting them. Andy makes a heart-fill speech which makes it all good with Spader's character and the members of the office. Andy had accomplished his goal of getting a half-day on Columbus Day. So it's a win win. And Andy did do good, I suppose with him at the helm. He will do just fine as a Michael Scott replacement, but he might want to step up his game though.

     To be honest, I thought the episode was pretty descend, for one that they don't have Steve Carell anymore. Nevertheless, the show still had the same level of humor as when they had Michael Scott (so there's going to be less “That's what she said” jokes, of course just a guess). Then again, I guess having B.J. Novak write this episode, was a plus on keeping it the same. I suppose it isn't that fair that I'm basing this whole season on one episode. I suppose I will just have to watch next weeks episode. And one more thing thought it's getting off topic, during the Office, there was this commercial for the movie, the Rum Diary and I'm pretty psyched about another Hunter S. Thompson film.